You Can't Always Get What You Want

This song lyric "you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you just might find, you get what you need" was part of this horrible fringe festival lounge-singer-themed play I went to. It sort of sums up the perspective I have found myself espousing lately.

I don't know where it came from, but, as of late, I find myself advising people to consider Plan B, and to settle. I am not talking in the relationship realm - but I am talking in the career realm.

I think it's an impending 30's thing.

Here are some examples:

• My wonderful friend is an actress who moved to NY to make it big. All that's happening are big bills. She isn't auditioning all that much and things are just not working out. I am encouraging her to consider other jobs in the acting field, like teaching, voice-overs, etc.
  
• My wonderful friend who wants to be a film-maker, but has a job at a University where she can earn a free degree - but not specifically in film. I am encouraging her to take the free degree in the most relevant fields possible and to work on films on the side (as opposed to incurring big debt for a gratuitous grad program).
• A friend who finished her grad degree and was unemployed for almost a year was terminated. She works at Trader Joe's part-time. I told her to consider moving to a cheaper city, like Denver, where the jobs are less competitive.

I used to be a dreamer - what happened? I have found that lots of people drive themselves batty about finding perfection in their jobs and lives. However, I think you can find happiness short of circumstantial perfection. Is this optimistic?

To see-saw a bit...

I found this week's onbeing on the Washington Post to be compelling. Basically, this dude was hit by a city bus and lost 9 years of memory. With a compromised memory, he found himself in a job he hated, with friends who were toxic. Basically, the amnesia made him realize that he was living his life based on habit, rather than altering elements that drained him. In sum, just because one day is one way, does not mean that the next day has to follow in a certain way.

I think living somewhere in between these perspectives is healthiest. Look at the good in your situation and don't expect perfection, but evaluate and change the things (friendships, work) that are truly weighing you down.